20 best Crazy Ex Girlfriend songs

I watched the third season of Crazy Ex Girlfriend recently (when it was put on Netflix), and was then compelled to go back and start re-watching the series from the beginning. If you haven't seen it yet, what are you even doing? It's brilliant. Anyway, here are my picks for best 20 songs in the show.

20. You're my best friend (and I know I'm not yours)

This is so sweet and semi-sad. And that's okay.

19. Having a few people over

This is just so personally hilarious to me in a way that no other song on this list is.


18. Friendtopia

Everyone's squad goals.


17. JAP battle

Lin-Manuel Miranda is shakin' in his boots.

16. We tapped that ass

Couldn't embed it, so click here to watch. A really fun number. 

15. I'm so good at yoga

Still one of my favorites from the series. 

14. Heavy boobs

I think blogger won't let me embed anything with a naughty word in the title, so uh, click to watch. I personally can't relate to this song in the slightest, but it's hilarious and for some reason my brain conjured up a parody, called "empty boobs" and I sing it to myself a lot. 

13. Settle for me

A solid song, and great scene.

12. Where's the bathroom?

Everything about this is hilarious.

11. I could if I wanted to

I love this grunge parody and the one-take shot. Perfectly captures Greg. 

10. Season 2 theme song

The best of the three theme songs. The uncomfortably long pause at the end is so... funny.


9. Tell me I'm okay, Patrick

The part when the box is playing the piano...

8. Let's generalize about men

This is how you do smart and funny commentary.

7. It was a shitshow

More sad than funny. I really liked Greg.

6. Gettin' bi

This song got Crazy Ex on my radar, since it went viral for obvious reasons.

5. The end of the movie

The biggest season 3 gem features none other than Josh Groban. 

4. West Covina

Where it all started. I love the big, Broadway feel of this, and the staging is very clever (because I'm hopelessly, desperately in love with...)

3. Sexy getting ready song

Click to see. Probably the most iconic song of the series, and another from the pilot episode. It's pure gold. 

2. After everything I've done for you (that you didn't ask for)

The only Paula solo song on the list, so sorry about that, but it's incredible. It has more intensity and plot-relevance than many other songs, and it's a total showstopper. 

1. You stupid bitch

Click to see a song about self-indulgent self-loathing. It's a laugh so you don't cry kind of thing.

Improv kitchen: Andouille tomato sauce

I should start keeping track of what I cook when I improvise, since that's the only way you'll ever write recipes. So, here we go with a new series.

Over the weekend, I got some andouille sausage from a smoke house in Duluth, and tonight I raided my cupboard to make a meal of it.

Here's what I came up with for ingredients:

1 small onion
3 garlic cloves
1 celery stalk
2 dried pasilla chiles
1 can of tomato sauce
1/4 pound andouille
A squeeze of tomato paste
Oregano
Black pepper
1 bay leaf
Salt
Olive oil
2 eggs

Makes 2 servings

Start by sautéing the diced onion and celery with olive oil and salt. De-seed and blitz the chiles into small bits, using a food processor or just your knife. Add the chiles, oregano, and black and pepper. Hold off on the garlic until you're happy with the onion's done-ness, and add it just before adding the tomato sauce.

While you're cooking the vegetables, fry up slices of sausage.

Warning: this smells insanely good.

Add the tomato sauce and fried sausages into the pot, and simmer. Add a little squeeze of tomato paste, if you have it. I reduced the sauce for a while, until it was pretty thick and all the flavors were melded.

You could definitely have this sauce with some pasta. But I didn't have any pasta. So, I opted for serving it with a fried egg.

This was seriously very good. If you're going to make something like this, I would recommend adding some diced bell pepper as well to round out the "holy trinity," and using crushed canned tomatoes instead of pureed tomato sauce.

Summer food plan...

It's getting sunnier and warmer out, and I'm getting really excited thinking about the abundance of fresh produce coming our way. Here's my plan for making the most of the season.

Sources of fresh, local produce

CSA farm: My mom gets a box every other week, plus you can pick your own food.

Frogtown Farm Market: This is new this summer, and will take place every Saturday morning, starting in June.

St. Paul Farmers Market: Every Saturday & Sunday morning, beginning in late April.

On-campus garden: I'm sure I can pick up some volunteer responsibilities, in return for some treats.

Free fruit picking

Fresh fruit is probably the best part of summer. I'm looking forward to picking serviceberries, raspberries, and cherries on campus. Last summer I discovered two mulberry trees, and I can't wait to return to them again this year.

Canning

Tomatoes. I didn't do it last year, so this year I am going to buy a huge quantity of end-of-season tomatoes and jar them so that I can make delicious tomato sauces all winter. I use a lot of canned tomatoes, so it makes sense to make my own.

Salsa verde. I've perfected my salsa verde recipe over the past two years, but tomatillos can be a little hard to find at grocery stores. So, I'm going to buy a huge quantity of them at the height of summer so I can have a stock pile of salsa verde in my pantry.

Fruit and jams. I want to make preserves from serviceberries, raspberries, cherries, mulberries, and ground cherries. And I would also like to try canning peaches.

Fermenting

Kimchi. I failed at my first kimchi attempt, but once I get my hands on a fresh Napa cabbage, I'm trying again.

Sauerkraut. A perfect condiment for summer brats.

Cucumber pickles. I want to try lacto-fermenting pickles instead of using vinegar.

Hot sauce. When the chili pepper boom comes at the end of the season, I will give lacto-fermented hot sauce a try.

Sharing

These canned and fermented items make great gifts, and are great additions to snack spreads, so I'm looking forward to sharing with friends and family.


I didn't do as much as I wanted to last summer in this regard, so I'm holding myself accountable this year. I'm gonna can a lifetime supply of tomatoes!

Missing the cultural moment: Why The Greatest Showman is already dated

I know I should stop complaining about this movie, but I'm obsessed with nailing down why exactly it didn't work. And I think I got to the heart of it. I'm not going to talk about the surface-level issues, that I've touched on previously, and that many others have pointed out. Instead, I'm going to argue that the root of the problem is that this movie was aiming for a certain cultural moment, and it was about ten years too late.

As you may know, The Greatest Showman should have come out almost ten years ago; it was first announced, and Hugh Jackman was attached, in 2009. If it had been released in 2011 or something, it would have been a pretty good movie. It fit with our ideas about self-acceptance and diversity at the time. I'm going to characterize these circa-2010 concepts as "uncritical self-acceptance" and "monolithic diversity."

By monolithic diversity, I'm referring to the media representation that all minority experiences are sort of the same, and how we're all treated badly by them (the word "oppressed" is never used, and the oppressor is never named). Basically, being a person of color is the same as being a woman is the same as being gay is the same as being trans is the same as disabled.

It's apolitical, in a way, because it never addresses mistreatment much worse than bullying. There's not a concept of systemic oppression. Movies and TV from the early 2010s are probably part of the reason why so many people today think that oppression is people being mean to you. That's an experience everyone can relate to, and it bonds all these diverse people together. Actual oppression -- the lasting legacy of discriminatory policies -- is not something everyone can relate to, and it impacts different groups differently. It doesn't lend itself to a feel-good, band-of-misfits romp.

Our cultural discourse has changed a lot in the past decade, and monolithic diversity doesn't sit right anymore. Even the concept of "diversity" feel dated, in a way. We've moved from "Everyone's the same on the inside!" to "People with different experiences are different, and that's valuable."

We're also more specific in our understanding of diversity, so it feels wrong to not break that out into categories for race, gender, sexual orientation, disability, etc, and look at those experiences individually. We understand now that these are not comparable experiences (even the experiences of different people of color (i.e. black, Asian, Latino) are all different), and that a person can be privileged on some axes and oppressed on others.

Showman did not delve into the differences or nuances between the characters' experiences at all, which led to some clumsy moments, such as the bearded lady saying, "Even our mothers rejected us!" to a group of circus performers, some of whom are not disabled or anything, they're just black. I'm gonna guess their mothers didn't reject them.

I don't want to fault this movie for being rated PG; this limits what the movie can do. I didn't need the movie to delve into systemic oppression -- that would be a high order, and obviously not every movie has to or should do that. However, recent PG-rated movies are getting more specific when it comes to diversity. They're figuring out that monolithic diversity isn't how we see the world anymore. Look at Coco, which can't be separated from its Mexican roots. This is all you have to do in a PG movie to prove that you understand the concept: Show that different people have different experiences, and be as specific as possible. Coco wasn't a Latino or Hispanic movie -- it was a Mexican movie.

In Showman, it would have been cool to have the circus performers talk about the different ways that they are mistreated, and stand up for each other. For instance, the white performers could stand up to a racist heckler. Or the really tall guy could intimidate someone who's picking on the dwarf guy. That's two scenes right there that could have demonstrated that the writers don't think that being a bearded lady is the same as being a dwarf or being black.

Now, to return to the idea of "uncritical self-acceptance." Culturally, we're moving from self-acceptance to self-improvement, and this has a lot to do with the concept of privilege. Privilege is a very misunderstood concept, but what we need to do is be aware of our own biases and try to improve ourselves. Showman repeatedly says, in song, "This is who I am, I don't care if the world doesn't accept me, I'm not gonna change, I'm not gonna apologize."

This is all fine and good when referring to things about yourself that aren't harmful or that you can't change, such as race or sexual orientation, but it's a message that we've heard a lot and I think we've internalized it. In fact, I think we've internalized it a little too much, and applied this reasoning to things about ourselves that are harmful and that we can change. We've moved past uncritical self-acceptance, and now we're ready to hear that maybe you should change. That you should be critical.

(I also want to comment on how the songs in the movie, especially "This is Me" repeatedly reference a mysterious they who want to tear the circus performers down. Who are they? Name them, you cowards! Down with the ruling class!)

These problems with the overall social message of the movie may be explained by the long production period. I'm not sure what exactly they were doing for 7 years, since they clearly weren't working on the script. Zing! 

But really, it seems like the movie was dreamed up in 2010, and then never updated to fit our current cultural moment. Back in the early 2010s, we were concerned about bullying, so uncritical self-acceptance was the response. Conversations about diversity were comparably apolitical. The "band of misfits" concept was popular: The experiences of a group of diverse people are equated as being sort of the same. I mean, look at Glee. Just about everyone has compared Showman to Glee, but it's an apt comparison.

I remember after watching the movie, I was confused because I couldn't figure out what the movie was trying to tell me. There was clearly a social message, but it's almost incomprehensible because my 2018 cultural framework is incompatible with the movie's 2010 framework. The Greatest Showman feels dated because it's responding to a cultural moment that we're 5 to 10 years past.



(Me @ me: It's not that deep, Hugh Jackman just wanted to be in a musical.)

12 Best Bojack Horseman Episodes

Yeah, I know I did my 10 favorite a year ago, but since then, season 4 has come out, so that needs to get folded in, and my opinions on some episodes have changed.

Plus, I developed a kind of rubric to rate the episodes. I was thinking about the things that mattered to me in an episode, and I broke it down into a few categories: the A-Story (character development, plot), the B-Story if applicable, humor, and angst. Bonus points for anything really special.

Because of this somewhat methodical rating of episodes, I am going to go out on a limb and call them the Best episodes, rather than just my favorites. But, you know. It's all subjective.


12. Stop the Presses

• A-Story: 7/10

This is one of those sorta-filler episodes where not much happens, but it's made interesting by the writing. 

• Humor: 7/10

The concept of the episode lends much of the humor. Not laugh-out-loud funny, but more... ironic-funny. Which, as you probably know by now, I love.

• Angst: 5/10

This episode is pretty Angst-Lite, compared to the rest of this list, but there are some good somber moments. "Are you afraid of being known and knowing others?"

11. After the Party

• A-Story: 7/10

Three couples get in fights. I love this set-up for an episode, and each of the scenes is good. 

• B-Story: 3/5

Todd "B-Story" Chavez, at it again, helping phones fall in love.

• Humor: 6/10

"Women on the wall: An exploration of gender in text and media, Barbara Krueger and Jenny Holzer in conversation with Helen Molesworth." And I love the mulch joke! I wish that was a joke you could practically tell in real life! However, the Vincent Adultman scenes aren't as funny as his other scenes.

• Angst: 7/10

I really love the last third of the episode between Diane and Mr. Peanutbutter. They both say some shit, but they work through it.


10. Ruthie

• A-Story: 8/10

This episode contains much of what happens to Princess Carolyn in season 4, so a lot happens. 

• B-Story: 2/5

The saving grace of this B-Story is that it's very self aware -- "Bojack and Diane, what are they up to?" -- and it takes up little screen time. But it's not that interesting, and ends up being inconsequential to the plot of the season. 

• Humor: 7/10

The "Miss Carrie" joke is one of the funniest of the season, but the future-humor doesn't totally land for me.

• Angst: 8/10

If we're being honest, I'm more upset about PC firing Judah than about her breaking up with Ralph. But that doesn't mean I don't care about Ralph, it's just a statement on how much I love Judah. I'm very, very upset about Judah. 

9. That's Too Much, Man!

• A-Story: 8/10

This is an integral episode to the rest of the series, and it follows up on previous events. I feel like I should put this episode higher up on the list, but. I'm not going to. I have to live my truth. 

• Humor: 6/10

There isn't a lot of humor in this episode, although I'll give a shout out to: "What's the old phrase? Beer before liquor, don't do heroin?" and "Audiences hate meta jokes! When will comedy writers learn?" 

• Angst: 8/10

Yeah, I'm not as affected by this episode as other fans are. Watching it makes me feel kinda gross and hungover, but I don't put this episode on if I want to feel really bad (I use "It's You" or "Escape From L.A." for that, if you're wondering). The last few minutes of the episode can get me a little choked up, however, depending on my mood.


8. Let's Find Out

• A-Story: 8/10

This is a more or less bottle-episode, and not much happens that has a lasting impact on the characters. Bojack and Mr. Peanutbutter's relationship isn't changed forever -- in fact, they never discuss this again, which is weird. That being said, this self-contained episode is one of my favorites, and I've found it to be the best episode to introduce the show, since the pilot is kinda... eh.  

• B-Story: 2/5

I wish the Todd/pen/mouse-girl storyline was 50% shorter. But J.D. Salinger is hilarious, so, it's not too bad.

• Humor: 10/10

This is one of the funniest episodes. 10/10. The absurd premise (J.D. Salinger emerges from his faked death to create celebrity game show) doesn't disappoint. 

• Angst: 6/10

Lighter on the angst, but I love the scene where Bojack and Mr. Peanutbutter "get real."


7. Fish Out of Water

• A-Story: 9/10

The main thrust of the episode is Bojack running into Kelsey and trying (and failing) to apologize to her. The more I think about this episode, the more I love it. I'm a very auditory person, so the first time I watched the episode, I had a hard time focusing. But I appreciate this episode more and more each time I watch it.

• B-Story: 3/5

This may be a mis-use of the term, but I'm considering the seahorse baby section of the episode as the B-Story. I like that it contributes to the running theme of "Bojack wants a family" but it's not as compelling to me as the main story.

• Humor: 7/10

Do you like visual puns? Boy, do I have an episode for you. The last few seconds of the episode are gold.

• Angst: 6/10

The episode is effective for what it tries to do, and the theme of "failing to communicate" is a frustrating one that everyone can relate to. 

• Bonus: +2

Of course, two bonus points for creative writing, great animation, and the sound editing for the underwater world. 

6. Stupid Piece of Sh*t

• A-Story: 9/10

A pretty simple, day-in-the-life plot serves as the vessel for the main point of the episode: character development for Bojack, and for his relationship with Hollyhock.

• B-Story: 1/5

I'm just not invested in Todd's season 4 storyline. It wasn't that interesting, and it eats up a lot of this episode. However, it's a blessing to see Princess Carolyn and Rutabaga interact. 

• Humor: 9/10

Bojack's internal monologue is as funny as it is cruel. Specific shout-out to the "Nice arm" line... 

• Angst: 9/10

The end of the episode! *clutches chest*

• Bonus: +1

A bonus point for a) the fun new animation style representing Bojack's thoughts and b) the creative narrative structure of exploring Bojack's internal life. 

5. It's You

• A-Story: 9/10

Bojack's life falls apart before his eyes! He pushes Diane away, his dreams die, Ana leaves him, Todd rejects him. This is a huge turning point, not only in season 3, but in the series as a whole. 

• B-Story: 4/5

Mr. Peanutbutter and Todd's shenanigans are well-contained, relevant, and entertaining. A point knocked off for how long the phone-chase sequence goes on... 

• Humor: 7/10

There's some spot-on dark humor ("There's going to be plenty of people around when I kill myself!") and some silly humor as well -- pause and read Mr. Peanutbutter and Todd's Oscars nominations board sometime. 

• Angst: 10/10

I love the opening fight between Diane and Bojack, and the final scene between Todd and Bojack seals the deal. It's probably the most angst-ridden scene of the entire series, and it cuts me to my core. 

4. The Telescope

• A-Story: 10/10

Tight writing, great flashback sequence. This is the first Great episode of the series, and proved the show's potential. 

• B-Story: 4/5

The saving grace is that the scenes between Todd and the "bling ring" girls are very short. I bet it takes no more than 3 minutes of screen time. Plus, it's decently funny -- "Did you hear that? He's letting his guard down!" One of the funniest moments of the episode is when Todd gets left behind at Herb's house, laying face-down in the grass.

• Humor: 7/10

The trademark dark humor is present throughout. Even the things that are not necessarily funny (Herb bluntly saying "I don't forgive you"; Bojack and Herb physically wrestling) can get a laugh. And I want to give a shout-out to the line "Some people prefer the later years!" because it's... so funny. 

• Angst: 9/10

Man... It's getting hard to articulate myself in the top 5. Herb says some important things, and I have feelings about it. 

3. Best Thing That Ever Happened

• A-Story: 10/10

This is my surprise pick of the top 3, even the top 5. This episode is so, so good. We needed a Princess Carolyn/Bojack catharsis, and this episode delivers. Their two decades of history feels real.

• Humor: 8/10

This episode has really successful humor. Shout-out to: the stereotypical Italian chef; the food critic; the valet dog; the business woman/donkey and her son; and the waiter who's very nonchalant about his terrible burns, and comes back to get his jacket. The comedic timing in the final scene alone is 3 of the points. 

• Angst: 9/10

Hoo, boy. This episode is so heartbreaking, and there's a major gut-punch at the end. 

2. Escape From L.A.

• A-Story: 9/10

This episode follows up on Bojacks' dreams of another life in another place, and in doing so, introduces a theme of the series: "You're the tarpit." The events of this episode cast a huge shadow over the rest of the series. There's a little meandering when Bojack goes to prom, but it's a tight episode.

• Humor: 3/5

"Kyle and the Kids" is a bop, but Pete Repeat is dragging the score down. But the episode doesn't aim for a lot of humor, so I'm only scoring it out of 5 total. 

• Angst: 10/10

Yeah, I don't have to explain this to y'all. 

• Bonus: +1

This bonus point is solely for last few minutes of the episode, and the palpable tension when Bojack leaves his door open, and Charlotte follows the balloon up to the boat... 

1. Time's Arrow

• A-Story: 10/10

It's not just character development for Beatrice -- this episode is integral to the over-arching season plot of finding Hollyhock's mom. It's a fantastically written episode. 

• Humor: 3/5

This episode is pretty serious as a whole; I'm scoring this out of only 5 points because I don't want to fault the episode for something it wasn't trying to achieve. However, there are some great darkly humorous moments. ("You'd better be worth all this"/"Well, you're not"; and "It will be nice to have something that always reminds me of this conversation")

• Angst: 10/10

Uh, yeah. It hurts. The last third of the episode is pretty brutal: Beatrice tells Henrietta "Don't do what I did"; the "womanly emotions" montage; and finally, in the present day, Beatrice recognizes Bojack, and they lie to each other in one last, small gesture of kindness. 

• Bonus: +2

One point for the incredible animation. The visual representation of Beatrice's dementia was at times beautiful and at other times frightening. "Time's Arrow" immerses us in Beatrice's head. The faces she doesn't remember are blurred out; the ones she'd rather forget are blotted out with angry black scribbles. Another bonus point for the writing.